Dear Dunkin’ Donuts lady,
No. I do not want a muffin or a donut with that. Please stop asking me. You already put seventeen sugars in my coffee. Are you trying to kill me by suggestively selling me a delicious chocolate-glazed donut? Or a four-pound blueberry muffin? Don’t you understand that I’m WEAK? Please don’t make me boycott you, Dunkin’ Donuts lady. Please don’t make me go to Starbucks where I have to learn all sorts of fancy ordering instructions. I just want my 2000-calorie coffee. Thank you.
Lisa
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2 comments:
I'm weak as well. When my kids to to their mother's I send the Captain Crunch with them -- if not I'll end up eating it popcorn-like while I watch Stargate.
(Yes, I know. Captain Crunch is Satan's Breakfast Cereal. It's one battle I've decided to let the boys win.)
Well, you could look at it this way (the way I do):
If your coffee is 2000 calories already, what's another 500?
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